Cousins

Everyone's family is different.  Different experiences, trials and tribulations shape the way families interact and react to different situations.  However, in every family there is always the one who starts the "drama," or who falls away from the family unit.  There is always that one who everyone seem to be drawn to, the perfect one, the over-achiever.  Everyone has at least one gay family member (i know that is terribly cliche to say but come on) and there is always one person who you get along with the best who is not in your immediate family.  That one person for me happens to be my cousin.  She is crazy; unfortunately that one personality trait in her is a mirror image of mine.  Our same disconnection to the world leaves us in a permanent loopy state of mind unable to grasp a tiny bit of sanity.  I wouldn't change us for the word. :)  

Marriage

Marriage is a part of most people's life.  Whether it last for eternity or fails to the unfortunate circumstances of each other's lives and leaves an unpleasant taste in ones mouth.  Why does marriage fail?  Is it because of stress?  Maybe the death of a child took a toll on both parents, or financial unsuitability was to much to cope with.  Either or, ending a marriage seems like the easy way out.  There are situations where ending a marriage is the best thing to do, but in more cases than one i believe families are becoming lazy and nonchalant about the true meaning of relationships and family ties.  These things take constant effort and maintenance.  When you purchase a new car the exhilaration in owning something so radiant and new makes your heart flutter and your mind wraps around your car with a type of tunnel vision.  Then time passes and you get used to having a new shinny car but an unspeakable bond develops.  You grow a certain loyalty to your new car.  But then the years pass and things start going wrong and instead of holding tight to something you once longed for so passionately and fixing the problem, even if it's severe, you buy a new car because its the easy thing to do.  The best things in life don't come easy.  

I must be a cynic

I have succumb to cynicism.  I believe the roots of my cynicism stems from my past around, oh let's say, 15 years ago.  I was in a ballet tap dance class and i suffered from allergies.  Itchy throats were not uncommon to spring up as an impulse of the moment type thing..so, when something itches the innate thing to do would be to scratch it.  So i did, with my tongue; unfortunately it made a terrible noise.  The ballet instructor then yelled, nay, screamed, nay cursed violently at me with blood shot eyes and gnarling fangs and growled at me commanding me to stop.  Okay, that was a slight exaggeration, but she could have asked my to stop...please.  So with that one seemingly unimportant event that happened in my life i became a cynic.  Just a mild cynic though nothing too extreme.  I would never sit in a theater yelling at the characters to learn how to act, or protest someone's creativity when i finished their novel.  I simply, but secretively, am cynical towards life.